Sunday, April 13, 2008

Socrelosis Madraeus

Common Name: Soccer Mom
Symptoms Include:
*Knowing who Gayle King is
*Reading Danielle Steel novels
*Having the same haircut since 1998
*Spending a third of your life in the Starbucks line
*Believing that Tipper Gore makes a solid argument
*Wearing jeans up to your bosom
*Driving an automotive shrine to your child
*Owning a Peter Gabriel and/or Phil Collins CD
*Dressing your whole family in Crocs
*Considering 9:30 PM to be 'late'
*Neglecting your steering wheel because your cell phone needs to know the best recipe for parmesan chicken RIGHT THEN
*Categorizing your closet into 2 sections. "Trackpants" and "Not Trackpants"
*Finding Dr. Phil 'charming'

If you or someone you know has 3 or more of these symptoms...
well I don't know what you can do. But THROW THE CROCS AWAY

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